In the gaming community there is a checklist of sorts that gamers go through in their mind to determine if a game is worth their while. This list is quite different for everybody, but there are a few universal expectations when one frees a shiny new game from its plastic wrapper prison. Usually this boils down to the game being fun, having intuitive controls, and having an interesting premise. Somehow this second entry in the Deadliest Catch franchise fails on every level. I mean, who doesn’t enjoy a game about catching crabs?
For the uninitiated, The Deadliest Catch is a show on the Discovery channel where rough and grizzled men and women scour some of the most dangerous seas in the world and try to support their families by crab fishing. If this sounds exciting to you then chances are you already watch the show. If this does not sound exciting, then you probably will not join the dozens of fans who will buy this game. You should not worry; however, you are better off without this turd stinking up your game shelf.
The premise for this game is crab fishing. Each level in the campaign is essentially the same; earn more money getting crabs than your opponent. Now, if that sounds interesting to you, then you are probably thinking of something else and should get your mind out of the gutter.
You may ask how one would go about angling crabs, and after playing this game I still could not tell you; the reason being is that instead of creating any sort of a simulation experience the game is simply a loose collection of mini-games. You may be the type that enjoys mini-games and crab fishing and you may still be entranced by the call of the Sea of Chaos. Well let me dissuade you person with strange tastes; there are a grand total of 4 minigames. Yes, 4 entire minigames that last a total of 5 minutes to complete all of them and over the course of the campaign you will be completing them about 5,349 times, or something like that.
Let us say that you are the type that could look past something silly like gameplay and dig right into the graphics. I have some bad news for you fair-weather gamer, the game looks pretty rough. There is only one model for crewmembers that you can draft for your cause, and it looks like a mannequin in a slicker. There is very little movement in the models and most communication is done through text or the ever annoying narrator. The only time you will see anyone’s face is the picture that accompanies them when you head to port to hire crew members. Ships are not detailed and the digital ocean does little to convey the power of the water. Everything looks dull and uninspired.
Maybe you are into some rocking soundtracks and can still enjoy a bad game if it has some smooth tunes. Well, to put it simply there is not music. Don’t get me wrong, there are a few 30 second sound loops that could roughly be considered “music,” but it is unimpressive and forgettable.
Most of the controls are relegated to the A button exclusively with occasionally mixing it up by throwing in the bumpers. If your reflexes can handle the complexity of the controls you may have the honor of completing the aforementioned 4 minigames until you either complete the campaign or find a hot griddle nearby and throw this disc on there to see if you can destroy all evidence that you ever owned this game.
I hate to rail on games that make an honest effort, but Deadliest Catch: Sea of Chaos does the bare minimum to be even considered a game. It is completely devoid of fun and tactic, the controls can be a little touchy even with just the one button, and the game somehow still manages to take itself so seriously that even the History channel would tell it to lighten up.
Trying to critique this game, is similar to trying to identify which part of a pile of vomit you dislike the most. You dislike the whole thing and when it all swirls together it is hardly worth trying to pick it apart like you would an honest, concerted effort. It is clear from the onset that this is a shoddily made title and its only reason for existence is to suck every bit of cash it can out of the series. I am embarrassed that I actually gave this title space on a page because a more concise review would be to say that it is the digital equivalent of shame. If you enjoy the show, do yourself a favor and watch the show and avoid the game, at all costs.
